Love is one of the most difficult (if not the most difficult) revelations for the human heart to take. Many say we were made and built for love. Others say that deep within us is the conditioning to love and be loved. However, we cannot ignore the fact that due to life’s hard knocks and tough, impossible situations, millions and millions of people live on the flip side of this love deal. The heart yearns and pines for love. Surges of hope assail us when we hear a love story, fictional or real. Then the memories of a less-than pleasant childhood or a relationship gone sour floats through our consciousness, and that hope begins to die a slow death. The devil makes it so hard for us to believe that we, imperfect as we are, can and should be loved. Plus, we forget that, imperfect as we are, we have deigned to love others at some point or the other and it stands to reason that we could also receive the same love from an equally imperfect person who is perfect for us.
But maybe we’re getting a little bit ahead of ourselves here.
Maybe it is so hard for us to grasp the idea and reality of love in its fullness and purity, unconditional and flawless, because we have never stopped to fully consider that there is Someone who could (and does) love us unconditionally for real. Of course, everybody knows that God loves them. We all know that, don’t we? Well, at least in our heads we do. We say it without true conviction because maybe it’s a new sin to not be able to say that God loves me. But we have not gotten a hold of the realness of such a love. The possibility of being loved this way is weighty. It breaks and burns the borders of “proper loving”. It messes with the whole program of our insecurity and unworthiness and the promise of us being embraced and changed by such a wholesome love threatens us. We are swallowed whole by the thought of being accepted this way. I mean, it practically causes our minds to snap.
How do I know this?
The mind is such a weird thing. Weird place.
In there, somehow, we rationalize and reason every love gift before accepting it, trying in some way to link it to something we have done or not done, whatever the case. So we start acting like Hosea’s Angel (Francine Rivers’ fan club, raise your hands) who decided to do everything possible to be either impressive enough for her new husband or disgusting enough to him. If you can’t earn it, crush it, right? Because, please, boy, how can love be free? Like that?
Hyaa! Abeg oh!!!
Too many negative things have made us lose trust in love, yet we want it.
We yearn for it.
Secretly, we cry for it, and vow that if we have one chance, just one, with love, we will take it.
How about breaking the love triangle, then? Instead of pursuing a guy or girl or mother or father or friend whose love you have to do a lot to earn and keep, how about turning around to learn to start receiving love from Someone who has loved you since before the beginning of time? How about reading His words over and over again until there is a bright flame of hope fueled by an unconditional, I-have-nothing-to-do-with-this love that makes you feel the special, all the romance, all the only-girl-in-the-world feeling you want? How about learning to simply believe and accept that you can be loved, and you are loved and that this love is enough? It is scary (if we’re honest), and we might lose ourselves – but that could be the very thing that saves us. We could be swallowed whole by this love (a whale kind of situation, maybe) but maybe we’ll be spit out in a better condition – not without our eye hair or with gross fish scent but covered and marinated in the fragrance of true love – content, grateful, free, happy, and the very best version of ourselves there could be.
I’m just sharing an idea, you know. Just saying. Because it’s this type of thing that I need. Na this kind love I dey find, and it’s been right here all along. There is Someone who loves me regardless of me, who is relentless and eager to beautify me with the riches of His love.
Why say no when yes is the good word?